Still here.

I feel the need to be random. And also to write. As you know, I have not been blogging for about two months. In ways, it's been pure...bliss. But, on the other hand, I miss writing things down. Putting pieces of my life to memory on this blog. I can tell you that there has been so many many things, little things, that i have wanted to blog about but then at the last second...didn't. First, I must say that NO ONE has offended me. I have cherished getting so many extra sweet friendships through this blog but there are days where i would feel like this blog was seen in a completely different light. I mean, I guess we all feel that way sometimes because we can't really express are whole selves on here without blogging 24/7. And I...am just not that type of girl. In the reals I can be really over sensitive and then others shrug it off.... but mainly I take alot of things to heart. Someone once told me that I seemed fake on my blog. That i was trying to impress more then just be me. Well yall, this upset me. Upset me more then I let on to that person and I guess that's what really started my lack of posting. I felt like, if that was what was truly being seen from MY blog then it just wasn't worth it. Oh sure you have the girlfriends telling you to get over it and to move on but really people....in life EVERYONE gets over things in THERE OWN time. And for me...I'm still trying too. I have NEVER been the type of person to tell others to move on. I guess because i know what it's like to try and move your life forward after something major to happen. Yes, there is the little things we just need to sweat but again...EVERYONE does things different. See's things different and presents things different.

For me, what you see on this blog is me. If you think I'm tryin to just impress you then BIG whoop, maybe I am. But it will be by my own terms and presentation. If you don't like what I post or that song or that movie or that book or whatever...go tell what you like on your own.

For now, I can tell you that big changes will be coming to my life. Soon. Changes like school. Trips to be taken. Buying my first Car. Leaving the hospital. And maybe....just maybe I'll release the story about boy named Adam. All I can tell you now is that in May, I will be coming to Utah for ten days for a friends wedding and Adam will be there. Things need to be said between us and how it will play out has resulted in LOTS and LOTS and even more LOTS of conversations with family members and girl friends. As for this blog, No comments from now on. I feel really strongly on just posting for me and if you would like to see/read....I'm happy you care enough to be in the know.

Update

Hey All. I'm Alive.


I'm going to be completely honest and say that right now, my blog is my LEAST thing to do on my "to do" list.

I have so much work. I have so many things to plan for church events. And I have so much other stuff I'd rather be doing then sitting at my computer desk for hours to update this thing.

I have issues with how my blog is received. I have issues with comments.

So for now, no posting. Oh sure, there's lots to show. Lots to say but frankly, I just don't feel like it! Plus, I don't have a computer right now thanks to a little thing called a computer crash and I'm waiting for it to be fixed.

When I come back in a month or two....No comments at all. I did this for a while, and I loved it! I want a fresh start with a fresh new look and with any luck, a fresh new attitude towards blogging.